In honor (?) of Final Exams
May. 8th, 2006 10:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
damontAnd since it is Final Exam time at my alma mater (not to mention a lot of other colleges across the country), I offer the following oldie-but-goodie that I wrote as a grad student (footnoted for extra clarity)...
The 10111rd1 Qualm
The PR1ME2 is my shepherd; I do not want.
It maketh me to stare long at green screens3.
It leadeth me beside the manual racks: it destroyeth my will.
It leadeth me in the paths of efficient algorithms4 for its CPU's sake.
Yea, though I walk in the valley of the shadow of Pascal5,
I shall fear many bugs, for no consultants are with me6;
My textbook and my notes don't comfort me.
I set me before a terminal in the presence of my printouts;
it7 bombardeth my head with error messages, my brain runneth for cover.
Surely sleepiness and misery shall follow me all the hours of the night,
and I shall dwell in the house of Jones8 for ever... and ever... and ever...
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Footnotes:
1. 10111 in base 2 == 23 in base 10.
2. The PR1ME was the main computer used by students, including for most CompSci courses.
3. Green letters against black background; common setup for terminals. White and amber letters were also common but all of them were called "green screens".
4. Originally "structured programming", but I changed it quickly because let's face it, structured programming doesn't help the CPU.
5. That I used Pascal as the language in question gives you an idea of when I wrote this.
6. The consultants have long since gone home to sleep. Or off to the bars to drink.
7. Referring to the terminal; see also "green screen".
8. Jones Hall is where the W&M CS department, and the most commonly used open-all-night lab, were located when I wrote this.
The 10111rd1 Qualm
The PR1ME2 is my shepherd; I do not want.
It maketh me to stare long at green screens3.
It leadeth me beside the manual racks: it destroyeth my will.
It leadeth me in the paths of efficient algorithms4 for its CPU's sake.
Yea, though I walk in the valley of the shadow of Pascal5,
I shall fear many bugs, for no consultants are with me6;
My textbook and my notes don't comfort me.
I set me before a terminal in the presence of my printouts;
it7 bombardeth my head with error messages, my brain runneth for cover.
Surely sleepiness and misery shall follow me all the hours of the night,
and I shall dwell in the house of Jones8 for ever... and ever... and ever...
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Footnotes:
1. 10111 in base 2 == 23 in base 10.
2. The PR1ME was the main computer used by students, including for most CompSci courses.
3. Green letters against black background; common setup for terminals. White and amber letters were also common but all of them were called "green screens".
4. Originally "structured programming", but I changed it quickly because let's face it, structured programming doesn't help the CPU.
5. That I used Pascal as the language in question gives you an idea of when I wrote this.
6. The consultants have long since gone home to sleep. Or off to the bars to drink.
7. Referring to the terminal; see also "green screen".
8. Jones Hall is where the W&M CS department, and the most commonly used open-all-night lab, were located when I wrote this.
